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Apr 22

How to Clean Up Your Entertainment Diet – GQ Magazine

Time to face facts: You're not gonna finish all those shows.

There are a few things you can count on every spring: baseball, barbecues, a Drake album, and people telling you something about how you should do some spring cleaning. It's generally a good idea. Cleaning up can do a lot to make you feel more productive and cheer you up some, and it's a good way to welcome the wider world back into your life after a long winter hibernationgiven, of course, that you live somewhere that has a winter. But let me make a case for another kind of spring cleaning: one for your Netflix queue, that pile of books you've been meaning to get to, or those video games still in the shrink wrap.

Almost all cleaning is a solution to the same problem: too much stuff. Accumulate stuff, and that stuff is bound to get out of hand, thanks to, like, entropy and shit. Because of the internet and Netflix and all manner of smart, connected devices and apps, there is so much stuff to entertain ourselves with. Way too much. Getting to it all can feel like a chore, and well, that kind of defeats the purpose of entertainment, doesn't it?

So let mesomeone whose job it is to consume an unhealthy amount of entertainmenthelp you out with a few handy tips of tidying up your entertainment diet, a few things to help you sift through what's great and what's not, and generally come to terms with the notion thatas Linda Holmes wrote in this essential 2011 NPR essayyou're going to miss out on most things, and that's okay.

You will never be caught up with all your friends. Here is a fact of existence, one that holds true in your work life, social life, and even romantic life: Someone is going to try and bully you into watching a TV show. Before you let them, think long and hard about how big a part of your life this person is, and how much you value their happiness. Outside of a very small circle of people, the answer will probably be "not that much," and you can feel free to ignore their recommendations. This is just simple survival math. Let's say people actively watch between one and five shows at a time, and you've got maybe four people tops that you really want to actively talk shop with. There's enough TV out there that all of these people can have an entirely different lineup of shows, and none of them are ones you watch. You can't keep up with all that and still have time for what you want. Y'feel?

So make acquiescing to a friend's recommendation the lavish, special occasion that it is, and make sure they know how highly you think of them when you agree to check out something they tell you about. They will probably tell you to stop being such a diva about it. But tough noogies. Netflix isn't going to watch itself.

If it's been a month, it's time to move on. It's easy to spend a lot of time thinking you like something when... you might actually not. Ask yourself: If it's TV, how long has it been since you last dropped in on a show that you made an effort to follow, or watch all of? More than a month? You're probably better looking for something you like more.

I'm not saying that the only shows worth your time are the ones that make you immediately clamor for more, where resisting a binge becomes a test of willpower. But if you enjoy something, it ought to linger. It doesn't have to be in some profound or obsessive way that has you scouring the internet for easter eggs or drafting your own fan theories. It can be simple as, Hey, this silly sitcom makes me feel good. I want to see these people tell jokes and make ill-advised decisions again sometime soon.

If you can't remember the character's names, put the show on notice. It doesn't have to be bad news if you don't know the names of the main charactersas shows have become more sprawling and ambitious, it can be hard to get a bunch of names down while you're trying to orient yourself in a show's sprawling world. But if you don't actually know what any of the characters are named, you should be able to articulate something specific that you do like instead. If you don't, think about ditching it. Or making it what I call a "laundry show," something to put on while I'm doing laundry or assembling furniture. Everyone needs a good two or three laundry shows.

Do you have a favorite episode, or at least, remember one specific episode? In the streaming era, people making TV shows have all figured out what "good" TV is supposed to look and feel like: usually quite serious and cinematically shot, with an arty and catchy opening credits sequence. But sometimes, "Good TV" and actual good TV are kind of hard to distinguish.

I'm not saying that the only shows worth your time are the ones that make you immediately clamor for more, where resisting a binge becomes a test of willpower. But if you enjoy something, it ought to linger.

A litmus test: Try to tell someone you know about one specific episode. It can be a favorite, or it can just be memorable, but a TV show is made up of episodes, and the episodes should matter somehow, and have some kind of point, however small or silly it may be. Otherwise, you're stuck with what I call the House of Cards problem, wherein hours of television go down smooth but largely consist of empty calories, with the only truly important stuff happening at the first and final few minutes of every episode.

Don't get hung up on endings. You don't have to see how everything ends. Conversely, the time you spent with an entertainment property isn't invalid or a waste if you never make it to the end either. This last point is something well worth keeping in mind when it comes to lots of video games and most superhero comics books, which are sprawling and long and don't always have proper endings anyway. But if you do like endings and find the journey to get to them insurmountable, Wikis are your best friend.

Don't worry so much about missing things. Here's a secret: Even plot-heavy, weighty shows like The Americans still use "previously on" montages to catch you up on just the things that you need to know for the episode you're about to watch. Also, if a show's any good, an individual episode will also still be a satisfying, complete hour or half-hour of television, and the confusing parts you can sort out later whenever you do go back and watch what you've missed, if it's a show you truly love. Don't let a couple missed episodes weigh you down and turn something you love into something that makes you feel guilty.

This also works really well with a lot of comic books and serialized works, especially if they're published monthlyimportant plot points are often repeated, recap pages usually catch you up to speed. I wouldn't recommend skipping a boring chapter in most novels, but if you're reading a nonfiction book for pleasure? Skip away.

Binge/read/watch/play for the moment. "I'm catching up," is often a default opener for a lot of conversations about pop culture, and homie, it's not a race. Don't let entertainment feel like a to-do list. So what if someone says you need to plow through all the Marvel movies before the next one comes out? If you don't feel like watching one, don't watch it. All these things are here for youto make you laugh, think, puzzle, cry, dance or just forget about all the other shit you have to do for a little bit. Don't let anyone take that from you.

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How to Clean Up Your Entertainment Diet - GQ Magazine

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