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Home » Diets that Work » Your Kids Dont Have to Inherit Your Body-Image Issues – The New York Times

Youll also have to reckon with the fact that even if you keep quiet about your own struggles, your children will notice if youre swearing off gluten to lose weight while they scarf down cheesy crackers, or if you never wear shorts on the hottest of summer days because you dont like your legs. Kids are so perceptive, Dr. Millner said. We need to be honest with ourselves and recognize that if were dieting, our kids will pick up on that. They may not have the language for it yet, but theyll know theres something going on for you with food.

Avoid statements like, Youre so lucky you can eat cake, when Im stuck with these carrot sticks! It may feel as if youre giving your kids permission to enjoy their treat, but youre also reinforcing the message that treats need to be earned, or that eating carrots is a punishment. Instead, try your best to share meals and snacks with your children. And consider whether following a diet that makes it difficult for you to embrace family meals is healthy for you, as a parent and as a person.

[Is mealtime miserable? Try this.]

If youre feeling like, I need to hide my diet from my kids, maybe what youre really saying is, I dont want to do this but I dont know what else to do, said Rebecca Scritchfield, M.A., R.D.N., a registered dietitian nutritionist who offers family counseling in Washington, D.C. Its OK to be in a hard place with your body. You dont have to have all the answers. But if you want your kids to not have such a fraught relationship with pizza, then you need to work on your own relationship with it.

Scritchfield suggests evaluating any potential diet or workout plan by asking two questions: In the long run, will this plan allow me to have a flexible, positive and joyful connection to food and movement? And, Is this advice Id happily teach my kids? If the answers are no, it might be time to reframe your health goals in a kinder, more body-positive light. Forget calories, and focus on enjoying your food even the ones you think of as bad, Scritchfield advised.

One recent study on intuitive eating found that giving ourselves permission to eat any food resulted in a healthier, more varied diet overall. Similarly, choosing physical activities because you find them genuinely fun tends to result in more regular exercise in the long-term than forcing yourself to do punitive workouts in the name of weight loss. Above all, be as patient with yourself as you are with your child when shes mastering a new skill. Most chronic dieters have years of body bashing to unlearn, Scritchfield said. Allow time to learn and grow.

Virginia Sole-Smith is the author of The Eating Instinct: Food Culture, Body Image and Guilt in America, and co-host of the Comfort Food Podcast.

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Your Kids Dont Have to Inherit Your Body-Image Issues - The New York Times

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Home » Diets that Work » Your Kids Dont Have to Inherit Your Body-Image Issues – The New York Times