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Feb 21

Don’t worry about how many calories you burn during sex it’s not about losing weight – Metro

Lose Weight Fast Comments Off on Don’t worry about how many calories you burn during sex it’s not about losing weight – Metro

(Picture: Ella Byworth for Metro.co.uk)

Every month or so, I see it: yet another article telling me the best sex positions for burning sh*t loads of calories.

Because sex is a fun way to exercise, right? More fun than running on a treadmill, anyway.

And we all know that if somethings fun, we should slap a number on it, start timing, and make sure that whatever the activity is, itsproductive, not just enjoyable.

Thats why I know that if I want to tone my bum and legs, I should opt for cowgirl position (even if its total sh*t). If I want to engage my core, doggys the way to go. If I want to build strength, I should do it standing up.

If Im trying to lose weight, I need to make sure the sex Im having is energetic, fast, and with plenty of thrusting. If I really want to do tone up, I can do lunges mid-sex.

This knowledge is, quite frankly, pretty bloody depressing.

The last thing I want to be thinking about during sex is my body-related insecurities, losing weight, and the three pastries I had for lunch.

Sex is supposed to be aboutfun. Its supposed to be about being in the moment, forgetting about everything else, and focusing on whoever youre having sex with and all the pleasure youre (hopefully) feeling.

The second you frame sex as a way to lose weight and stack up your activity count for the day, youre missing the point.

The minute youre timing sex, youre not in the moment.

Once you start choosing positions based on how many calories they burn instead of how good they feel, youre missing out on pleasure.

And if youre viewing sex as a way to fit in some exercise, rather than something you actually want to do just for the fun of it, youre making sex a chore.

Which is a massive shame.

Sex is one of the few pleasures in life that as long as the people doing it are consensual adults and no ones getting hurt we can enjoy without having to worry about doing things right or making sure what were doing is productive.

Sex is something far away from work and all the other errands adults have to do. Its something we do purely for enjoyment (unless were trying to procreate, which is a whole other load of stress).

Trying to smush it into our fitness routines, our calorie counting, and the pressure to always be doingsomethingthats good for us ruins the fun of sex.

Its a great idea to try to make health and fitness fun, and to burn calories doing something you enjoy. And Id never bash anyone for doing that instead of forcing themselves through circuit training or spinning.

But there are some things that need to be kept separate and your fitness routine and sex are part of that.

Because much in the same way that making dancing your exercise routine instead of just something you do for fun makes it feel like a drag, the same is true for sex.

If youre one of those people who loves working out as in, truly, honestly loves the feeling of exercising youre probably not counting calories too closely.

You run because you love the feeling of your feet hitting the pavement. You play football because you love it. Yes, you box because you know its good for you, but also because you love how it makes youfeel.

If youre working out just to tot up a calories-burned count, it feels more like a chore. Youre not thinking: ooh, this is fun. Youre thinking: how much longer do I have to do this until Im done?

And while that may be okay for Zumba (we do all need to get some exercise in, so its okay to do something you dont enjoy just to stay healthy), sex doesnt deserve this kind of disrespect.

How would you feel if the person you were having sex with was tracking it on their Fitbit? How would you feel knowing that while youre enjoying waves of pleasure, your partners timing each thrust, adding up the calories, and telling themselves that theyll be able to skip the oblique twists if they keep going for five more minutes?

Not great, we imagine.

By turning sex into a way to burn calories, we take away the joy of sex for sexs sake. We make it into something we have to do. We turn it into just another thing on our to-do list, because we just cant relax and do nothing that isnt taking us closer to our goals.

Its rude to our partners, who are more than just exercise machines, but more importantly, its a way to cheat yourself out of sexual joy.

Sex is great. Its pure pleasure. Its not something that needs to be done, its not a target to be ticked off or an achievement to unlock.

We need to stop trying to repurpose sex into another way to fulfill our goal-obsessed, pressured needs.

Enjoy the fact that yes, a really great sex session is good for your health. But dont turn it into yet another thing that you track, analyse, and change to burn as many calories as possible.

Keep your calorie counting to where it belongs: when youre eating or when youre doing a workout purely for the sake of working out.

Calorie counting is mostly miserable. Sex is brilliant. Never should the two meet.

MORE: We need to stop making sex so goal-oriented

MORE: Masturbation Month: How to have better orgasms

MORE: 17 seriously rubbish parts of having doggy style sex

See more here:
Don't worry about how many calories you burn during sex it's not about losing weight - Metro

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